daft punk is playing at my house

first thing up, i am not about to whine about how i'm drowned in self-pity cos' i'm not. and though i really hate how i react to things sometimes, i seriously do not hate myself. i just need a means to vent and hopefully, something good would come out of it. and something good doesn't mean somebody coming up to me, pat on my shoulders & say "i feel so sorry for you", but it actually means stepping up my gear and overcoming the hurdles coming up against me.

so here it goes,

i hate myself for being so sensitive to others' feelings that i put others infront all the time, even though that means making personal sacrifices.
i hate myself for being so dumb and not speaking up when things are not going my way & eventually, looking like a fool following others' orders.
i hate myself for being so shallow and inexperienced and not able to make any convictions in whatever i do.
i hate myself for being too confident at times and believing that everything will go smooth and life will forever be good.
i hate myself for being such a pig & throwing away all my time when they can be spent doing or learning more meaningful things out there.

i could go on for days but i bet this is not what you want to read.
but stomping the keyboard, churning all this out, really felt great.